Yesterday I took Porter and Penelope peach and blackberry picking at Larriland Farms. On the way there, we had some pretty amusing conversations:
1. Porter asked Penelope if she knew why duct tape was called duct tape. She said no, of course, and so Porter proceeded to tell her the following story (this is nearly word-for-word; I scribbled it down at the next stoplight so I wouldn't forget): "A long time ago, people used to have ducks as pets. And there were ferral dogs and ferral cats running around...bob cats, pumas...you know, that kind of thing. Well, they used to come and try to eat the ducks all the time. The would scratch up the ducks, and the tape was used like Band-aids. That's why it's called duck tape!" I asked him where he learned that, and he said, "I asked my dad a long time ago, and that's what he told me." I think Mathew needs to work on his truthiness.
2. Penelope was lamenting having to sit in a carseat, when Porter doesn't have to. Porter told her it was because he was bigger than her. She said, "Porter, I just wish I was you!" I told her that then she would have to be a boy, and asked if that's really what she wanted. Porter piped up, "Of course it is!" I asked him why, and he replied, "Because boys don't have to make babies. That's why we're better."
3. Porter told me he was going to grow up and invent water-proof Band-aids. I told him they had already been invented, and after a few moments of shock and disbelief, he recovered and said, "Well, then I'll just invent water-proof books. That way, when you're reading in the bathtub and somebody comes by and scares you, you don't have to worry about your book getting all wet if you drop it."
8.06.2009
Robot
On Monday evening Scott and I went over to Matt and Cassy's house for dinner. Penelope, who was supposed to be taking a bath, suddenly appeared in the hallway, stark naked. She was moving her head and arms in short, jerky motions, and saying in a monotone voice, "I-am-a-robot. No-one-may-pass. I-am-a-robot. No-one-may-pass."
8.05.2009
Myrtle Beach
We took a family vacation to Myrtle Beach at the end of July, and of course the kids said a ton of funny things. I picked out a few of my favourite stories from the trip:
1. After a long day of walking around Brookgreen Gardens, Penelope announced, "I'm a really really tired dinosaur!"
2. One evening Penelope was trying desperately to get Porter, who was running up and down the stairs, to listen to her. She literally spent 10 minutes saying, over and over again, "Porter, be still! Be still, Porter! Hmmph. Porter, I'm trying to tell you something! You have to listen to me! You have to liiiiisssssssseeeennn tooooooo meeeeeeee!!! Okay. Porter, stop talking. If I hear your voice one more time..." I was amazed that she never gave up.
3. Sarah Ann's carseat is in one of the bucket seats, right behind the passenger side. During one ride home from sightseeing, she kept kicking the seat in front of her, where her mother was sitting. Leslie asked her nicely a few times to stop, without success. She then threatened Sarah Ann with a minor punishment, to which Sarah Ann replied, "But I'm so hungry!"
Not really sure what the connection is there.
4. Led by Rachel, the kids got together early in the week and decided they were going to start plotting TAs - "Tricks on Adults". They tried multiple times to put salt in our water, hoping we would unknowingly drink it, and eventually they succeeded. They laughed and laughed and laughed. So we told them that we were going to plan some TKs - "Tricks on Kids". We kept talking about the secret TKs we were planning, warning the kids that they never knew what to expect or when to expect it. They very quickly became paranoid, and convinced that around every corner was a TK waiting for them. Porter, for instance, sat on a plastic cup on the floor and immediately jumped up, insisting that an adult had placed it there just for him. The best TK we ever did was doing absolutely nothing.
5. During the whole TA/TK fiasco, Sarah Ann came up to me and whispered, "I have a great idea for a TA!" I asked her to tell me in my ear what it was, and this was her reply:
"Okay. Well, you know how some of the adults don't like salt in their water?" (At this point I wondered if there were any of us who DID) "Well. I'm going to make them THINK there is salt in their water, but there's really not, so when they drink it, they'll be really surprised! Heeheehee!" That's a good trick, Sarah Ann.
1. After a long day of walking around Brookgreen Gardens, Penelope announced, "I'm a really really tired dinosaur!"
2. One evening Penelope was trying desperately to get Porter, who was running up and down the stairs, to listen to her. She literally spent 10 minutes saying, over and over again, "Porter, be still! Be still, Porter! Hmmph. Porter, I'm trying to tell you something! You have to listen to me! You have to liiiiisssssssseeeennn tooooooo meeeeeeee!!! Okay. Porter, stop talking. If I hear your voice one more time..." I was amazed that she never gave up.
3. Sarah Ann's carseat is in one of the bucket seats, right behind the passenger side. During one ride home from sightseeing, she kept kicking the seat in front of her, where her mother was sitting. Leslie asked her nicely a few times to stop, without success. She then threatened Sarah Ann with a minor punishment, to which Sarah Ann replied, "But I'm so hungry!"
Not really sure what the connection is there.
4. Led by Rachel, the kids got together early in the week and decided they were going to start plotting TAs - "Tricks on Adults". They tried multiple times to put salt in our water, hoping we would unknowingly drink it, and eventually they succeeded. They laughed and laughed and laughed. So we told them that we were going to plan some TKs - "Tricks on Kids". We kept talking about the secret TKs we were planning, warning the kids that they never knew what to expect or when to expect it. They very quickly became paranoid, and convinced that around every corner was a TK waiting for them. Porter, for instance, sat on a plastic cup on the floor and immediately jumped up, insisting that an adult had placed it there just for him. The best TK we ever did was doing absolutely nothing.
5. During the whole TA/TK fiasco, Sarah Ann came up to me and whispered, "I have a great idea for a TA!" I asked her to tell me in my ear what it was, and this was her reply:
"Okay. Well, you know how some of the adults don't like salt in their water?" (At this point I wondered if there were any of us who DID) "Well. I'm going to make them THINK there is salt in their water, but there's really not, so when they drink it, they'll be really surprised! Heeheehee!" That's a good trick, Sarah Ann.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
